Wednesday, May 20, 2009

...You might be a redneck

One of my favourite stand-up skits is Jeff Foxworthy's You Might Be a Redneck. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this skit, I'll try my best to give you a little taste of it.  Jeff likes to remind people that they could be considered a redneck if they do certain things:
  • "If you take your dog for a walk and you both use the tree at the corner...you might be a redneck."
  • "If the word Nascar appeared anywhere in your wedding vows....you might be a redneck."
  • "If your dog passes gas and you claim it....you might be a redneck."
  • "If you wear a dress that's strapless with a bra that isn't...you might be a redneck."
and my personal favourite...
  • "If somebody yells 'hoedown' and your girlfriend hits the floor...you might be a redneck."
Now you might be asking yourself, "what does this have to do with strength training?" Well, as many of you know, my mind works in mysterious ways. Specifically, everything in life seems to remind me of a movie scene or comedy skit. So, while I was training a client I saw another guy performing an exercise, and it came to me: "I need my own skit". But this one doesn't involve rednecks...it involves not getting the most out of your time at the gym. 

So without further ado, here's my list of wonderful things I've seen that have me questioning - what the hell are we doing here?:
  • If you can perform a leg press while talking normally on your cell phone...you might not be working hard enough
  • If you can ride the elliptical with jeans and uggs...you might not be working hard enough
  • If you can say more words to your friend than reps in a session...you might not be working hard enough
  • If you want to enroll in the army but can't lift half as much as the 50 year old woman next to you...you might not be working hard enough
  • If you sound like you're having an orgasm on every rep...that's just messed
Unfortunately, these are all things that I have encountered. Hope you enjoyed a the lighter side that the training world has to offer...it sounds better if you read them in a southern accent like Jeff Foxworthy!

Thanks for reading.

2 comments:

Mujahid said...

Love it Paul - it is so true!

Will be sharing it with my team.

Paul Hemsworth BHK, CSCS, CEP said...

Thanks Mujahid, I appreciate the support!